Keeping a birthday ritual
Ruth Less had a great birthday (we think). In a total reverse of our usual routine of eating only food we grew ourselves, we ate take-out pizza and a grocery store cake. It tasted good, but there’s nothing like a food hang-over to remind us of why we grow our own food. I can’t take the preservatives anymore, probably too many years of ruining my adrenal glands. Junk food or even processed food during the day, puts me to sleep – literally. So I have to imbibe at night, so I can sleep it off.
Ruth Less was born in the evening, so like Paula, we always tell her she has to wait to celebrate. But, using a ritual we borrowed from my parents, we light a birthday candle while we eat, and open presents.
Just one large candle.
My brother was born during WWII, and he shared his birthday with my aunt and uncle’s wedding anniversary. My brother was the first born in my family, and for his first birthday my aunt and uncle gave him a large candle. At one, I’m sure he wasn’t even aware of the candle. Times were hard then, but this was a fairly inexpensive gift. But, it became the centerpiece of our Christmas dinner table every year. That candle would be lit before any guests even arrived and sometimes would burn into the wee hours. We never thought of it not lasting, and we never thought my brother wouldn’t last. The candle was so big, and after all, it was just a candle.
These candles come in all sorts of holiday shapes, and are very collectible. A petroleum by-product, they were sold by the oil companies in the 40′s and 50′s. My brothers birthday candle was just a 15″ candle, red for Christmas.
We burned that candle so much over the years, joking about how small it was getting. But when my brother was diagnosed with cancer, we started being more frugal with the time the candle was lit. Never before dinner, and as the evening progressed no one wanted to be the first to snuff the flame, but someone always stepped forward and did it. We felt guilty about the teasing about how small the candle was getting.
My mom had always saved the bits of melted wax from the plate and carefully placed the shards in the candle box.
It was HD’s idea to buy a candle for our daughter, she didn’t know anything about the candle when she was one either. And now it is just a part of her birthday every year. The only difference is that HD and I make sure we don’t let it burn too long… .
Food Renegade
Simple, Green, Frugal Co-op
Sounds like you all enjoyed a wonderful celebration. I love how your family members share significant dates, and I really love how you keep traditions alive. The candle idea is so wonderful, and it’s terrific that you’ve given your daughter another connection to her late uncle via the candle. Is the aunt and uncle who gave your brother his 1st birthday candle the same ones that you made the quilt for? How wonderful, too, that the red candle still has life in it. I’ve got to tell you, from one mother to another, I could picture your mom lovingly saving all the candle wax melted bits and placing them in the box. When I looked at the photo of the candle, it’s those little pieces carefully saved year after year that I honed in on. Hope everyone’s tummy has settled down from the pizza and cake. Just think, fifteen years ago you had a brand new, newborn little babe. It’s been a while since I held a newborn … makes me smile, just thinking about it! Oh, love those lit candle shots, too!
One large candle can tell a lot of stories. And I loved reading about them. An additional kind of glow, I’d say. Glad it was such a meaningful happy day!
What a sweetly touching post….as always I am so sorry about your brother. I hate to even imagine how hard that must be for you….seeing your candles reminded me so much of my grandmother. She had all kinds of them that she burned on special occasions and as kids we loved them. thanks
Very touching. Thanks for sharing.
When I visit blogging friends I am always struck by how human we all really are. And strangly, while blogging we tell the world the most amazing parts of ourselves, the parts that make us real. Whereby in the real, non-blogging world, it can take months or years or even never for the vunerable ‘real’ side of us appears.
I love this post, I love knowing you, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your sharing with us the love for your brother and the joys and sorrows of your life.
Linda
http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com
What a great idea!
My sister got a gift when each of her children of a birthday candle. It’s a special candle with numbers down the front. You burn it on each birthday and you only burn down to the next number. That way it’s saved from year to year.
I am touched by the candle and the post
I so enjoy reading about your family celebrations. They always have such deep meanings…..so many families do not have that anymore and I thinks it’s so important. Thank you for sharing another great family tradition.
I’m glad Ruth-Less had a great birthday. 15 – such a fun age
I enjoy hearing your family traditions, it’s something we never had and it makes me sad that we didn’t.
‘Take out pizza and grocery store cake’ sounds like a title for your book!
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What a great tradition!
what a neat idea. i hate those crappy little candles they sell for birthday cakes! i just may have to steal it even though my kids have already had many birthdays.
i know what you mean about the sugar hang over. ugh. it’s amazing how awful something you’re not used to eating can make you feel.
This is lovely and sweet. Thanks for sharing once again.